Perfect

It's almost christmas.

I'm home, hubby is home.

Cunksi is here this year.

Life is perfect.

At this time last year, I was horrifically ill and bed bound with pneumonia.

I was also pregnant, and didn't know it yet.

I was sick because I was coming off the last two hellish years I'd had since I could remember.

But even as I coughed and hacked my lungs out, cikala cunksi was growing and soon i would discover her presence.

Life would never be the same.

I'm glad.

She has made my life perfect. I love her, she is perfect, and I'm so honored to be her mother.

As I write this, she is in the other room with her Ate, they are dancing together, she has a huge smile across her face.

Next to her Ina, her Ate is her favorite person.

She is a mini me. it is wierd to look in someone's tiny face and see your features staring back at you.

Or see traits in someone else that you realize are your own.

Traits that are cute in a three month old.... tho I do have more pity for my husband now ... such a saint to live with me.

Two people created this beautiful, amazing, perfect creature; who already at three months knows she rules the roost and is the tiniest diva.

It's great.

I've said it before and I'll say it again.

I was put on this earth to do a lot of things... but the most important thing I was brought here to do was be cunksi's Ina.

The honor is mine.

If it is awile before I check back in, merry christmas everyone. Happy holidays, enjoy them, may you get what you need in the new year. and what you want.

I'm back

Hard to belive baby girl is going to be two months old. ( In ten days.) Life continues to be amazing as I spend time with this beautiful being.
There are some fabulous things around the bend for hubby and I, nothing concrete right now, but by the third week of nov, things will be more set. New adventures to be had, and I'm really excited.
The new book is out! I can't believe it, (it has only been 4 or 5 years in the making, due to publishing glitches, funding and editors getting sick.) It's really amazing.. they sent us the gally, and it was really powerful just like that. But to see it in print now, is mind blowing. I'm in the company of some amazing writers! I'm honored to be too! It has been a long time coming, but it is going to make a difference in a lot of people's lives. Which is what I think writing is supposed to do.
Baby girl is alseep right now, and I should be working.... but I'm not. I need to eat something... I've dropped so much weight from breastfeeding, I'm looking gaunt and emaciated. I had no clue how much breastfeeding would take out of me. Then many days I don't really get to eat until hubby gets home... I'm so busy taking care of Cunksi. It's funny because someone said to me: baby's gaining weight and getting bigger, but you are getting smaller. I am just glad she is growing so well. That is all that matters ultimately. And it's nice to see that what I am doing for her is making a difference. Good food and lots of love, that is what makes babies grow!
OH!
Happy Holloween! If you come to my house to trick or treat.. you will see baby girl in her cute little costume. I was going to go out trk or trting wiht my sis and her kids... our annual thing.. but it's too cold for a baby girl! So, we'll stay home and give out the yummies!
Have fun and get lots of treats!!!!

OY

well. what a time it has been.
First and foremost, the reason I am writing this is because we are introducing the bottle. OOOOOOO.
Very very hard times. I'm not putting her on the bottle, but we need to have her be able to take it for times when I am not able to feed her. Such as when I have to go to the dentist and get my teeth fixed, as well as when i have to go give readings... which is coming up soon. Her father will be with her, but even so, he still has to be able to feed her while I'm giving my reading, visiting classes, or being on a panel.
It's still hard though. Neccesary, but hard. I left the house to make the transition easier on all involved, but it felt like I was leaving a vital part of me behind. Thoughts of my baby thinking I abandoned her went through my head. So, I had to take a deep breath, tell myself it would be fine, and if I relaxed, she would too.
It worked, it was still hard, but it worked. She took the bottle, and for now, all seems well. (thank god for cell phones.)
She seems so young to be doing this, but we have to in order to have her feeding from the bottle by the time my reading in colorado comes.
In other baby news, she is doing well. Growing amazingly, she was 9# 5 oz. two weeks ago. She has outgrown all her 0-3 month clothes. Amazing! I'm so proud of her! Her legs are getting so long! And she is sleeping well, though her sleeping has never been an issue. She is starting to stretch her feedings out to four hours through the night.
OK, that is all i have for now... more later.

Slip Sliding away

such does the time.
I have not posted, I know... but I have this gorgeous creature to care for. She has no time for anyone else, and simply wants to be in my arms, pressed against my chest, where our heart beats match and our breathing synchronizes.
Fine with me.
She is so beautiful.
She has been having tummy troubles, still. Our pediatrician and other medical people and non medical people keep saying..."she'll grow out of it, soon." But they don't sit with us when our darling daughter screams in pain and cries and looks at me/us like, "why can't you make it better mommy?"
Gut wrenching.
When you become a mother, you leap headfirst into all kinds of lessons. I think this is one of mine.
I've always wanted to keep my precious daughter from any pain, unhappiness or uncomfortablity. I've prided myself in the fact that I kept her safe, healthy and happy for nine months. I birthed her safely, and she was happy and ready to greet the world when she appeared.
I can't keep her from feeling this pain. I know it's a "random baby stage", but any parent who can stand by nonchalant while thier offspring is in pain....must have something wrong with their head.
So, I know that my lesson in all of this is, I have to acknowlege that I can't take this pain from her, I can't shield her from this, or make it stop. All I can do is what I will be doing her whole life. Holding her, telling her I love her, being with her. I can't take the pain for her, but I can be with her while she goes through it, so she doesn't have to do it alone.
And I can take comfort in the fact that she is doing fabulously, growing so fast, developing so well, (ahead of her age bracket actually) and when she isn't having belly pain.... she is a happy well adjusted little bebe, who is well aware of how much she is loved, not only by her parents but by so many other people.

oops- gotta go- cunksi is awake.... more later

baby girls b-day

Baby girl turned three weeks old today.
she is growing so fast! Everyday she changes. the nurse came by to see her on friday.... she is 8 and 1/2 pounds!!!! I'm so proud of her!!!!!
And she is getting so long!!! I can't believe she has only been on this earth for three short weeks.
I still want to stare at her all the time... but I've gotten better about getting down to the business of sleeping when she does. Those first VERY sleep deprived days really taught me a lesson.
I'm so overwhelmed by the awesomeness, beauty and power of her.
Life is perfect.
I blew off my deadline. (Shame on me) I didn't send anything to the publisher. There were just too many other things to do. well, not things... taking care of my daughter. That is what I've done, in lieu of writing my essay. There are tons of things I need/want to work on, manuscipts and such..... but it all seems so UNIMPORTANT right now.... in the shadow of my daughter. I will get back to writing... someday. I'm not going to rush it. Right now, this girl is little once...and I don't want to miss anything.
Her arrival was long coming. I am going to savor every minute of it.

Whirlwind

Wow, I've been swept away by motherhood.
It's wonderful.
And trying.
And tiring.
But so worth it.
Baby girl has grown and continues to grow so well. She is already a pound heavier than she was at birth, and an inch longer. And she is only two and half weeks old!! The power of breast milk!!!!
I'm so proud of her!!!!
Our pediatrician is really happy with her progress and loves her to death.. which is so fab. I really like him. He is personable and great with her and understanding of how nervous and freaked out new parents can be. He is kind hearted and appreciates our daughter like we do. I wanted my pediatrician to be similiar or have much of the same values and views as T. Berry Brazelton....(my hero) and he does. woo hoo!!!
There is so much to say, about the whole birth exprience.. and what has happened since then.
Ate' went back to work this past monday... he was a bit glad to get back. Nights were pretty long around here for those two weeks.
She is such a fabulous being.. so well tempered. She's not a constant screamer... despite the fact that she has had tummy troubles.. she will scream sometimes, but not continuously. She calms herself fairly well and is such a happy baby. her little face changes everyday... she is growing so fast. I have to take pics every day.. she changes overnight.
I am sleeping more and sleeping when she sleeps... which is all the time. But, most days it is really hard because when i have gotten done nursing her, and I lay her down next to me.... all I want to do is stare at that beautiful face... that little face that we created... the perfect little being. She is just so perfect. I can't get over it. She's a snuggler, which is nice. Not suprising, but nice.
I do nothing but nurse her and carry her around all day. Which isn't conducive to getting anything else done. She's a momma's girl, which is nice.. and normal.. and not something I will complain about. i will learn to get over the urge to clean my increasingly messy house and just let things be as they are. The time I have with her now... will never happen again.. she will only be at these stages once. And she is changing so fast. I dont' want to miss anything.
I am able to write this now because Ate' is watching little miss and I have some alone time... time I should be using to get an essay done that is due at the publishers in two days.
But I have baby brain and it is too soft to form much coherent thoughts.
I had to send pics to the relatives and such other important people in her life.. so that took up some time.
Now Im ready to go hold my daughter again...
well, maybe I'll take a shower first.
Ok, I will post more later. Promise. It may be a few days... but I will get it done.
be well, MBB

The Most Beautiful Girl in the World

Sorry for the absence... but I became a mother.

On Sept 9, 2007, at 2:26 p.m, Rich and I welcomed little Miss Artichoker who was 6# 9 oz and was 19 and 3/4 inches long. (her name is purposly withheld)
She is the most gorgeous thing I have ever laid eyes on.
My labor lasted 5 1/2 hours,was drug-free and easy. I pushed her out in 20 minutes.
more details to follow.....when i have time.
Right now all I want to do is hold her and stare at her.

My life is complete. I never need anything else for myself again.

and the verdict is........

No baby today.

Funnies and other stuff

No, no baby yet people.
She isn't "technically" due until tomorrow... so if you are waiting.. (so sweet of you) check back tomorrow.

In other news... today was a fab day. after a week of hell. In a matter of days I succumbed to a broken tooth, an infected tooth, much pain and agony, a smashed foot which ended in a broken toe, and just in general, much misery at being nine months pregnant which was worsened by my (and hubby) coming down with colds.

Oh the misery. It truly was not pretty around here... I swear I could not go out in public without bursting into tears. Why in public? I guess because leaving the house meant I actually had to walk about, which put me in much pain.. exacerbated my false- but- still- painful, contractions, and where I would inevitably hit my broken toe, or step on it wrong.. and life was simply too much to deal with. I actually was standing in Hyvee crying, as people were walking around me looking at me as if I were from mars and had two heads. Normally, had I not been having a rainstorm of hormones, it would be funny and I would expect them to stare at me, I'd probably even laugh with them, but not this time. I just got mad. This only further frustrated me and I retorted to them: "What people, have you never seen a preganant crying woman before?! Stop staring!" To which they really thought then that I WAS mental. My husband just stood there, holding me, letting me wail like a very pregnant woman. He's soo good.
But today.. was a good day. I got enough sleep, I was not in pain, it was not too hot, and I took my dog to the river. If you have my other blog address, you can see the pics.

So, all this craziness, i hope means that baby is on the way.
More tomorrow. promise. go look at the pics. if you don't have the addy, email me and I will give it to you.
be well, MBB

A low hum

There is a low hum that has been running through me the last two days. It almost feels like a low grade fever, or like you feel right before you come down with a cold... it's this hum of energy that flows through you. You can feel it, but you can't see it yet. It's a bit like anxiety...but not of the nervous, freakish kind. Like the waiting for something to happen kind. I suspect it's the baby... but then nothing happens and I'm left all restless like. I can't eat or sleep much... I'm not quite sure what to do with myself. I should sit down and write... but then I grow uncomfortable, and I have to get up and move around.
In other news... I will probably take a teaching postion on the spring at a Tribal college. (Location purposely withheld.) I have a friend who is an instructor there as well and they have been trying to get me to come teach for some time... but the details were never right. But now they are bringing me in as a visiting writer and then I'll teach a couple of classes for them. I'm also going to do a workshop there, which makes me really happy. So, that is exciting.
Our air conditioner in the bedroom is broken.... which makes sleeping not fun. I sleep for about two hours a night... and two hours a day. My belly is too big to get comfortable very long. I have slept my two hours...so now I'm up for the night.
Anxious.
Waiting.
Trying to live life normally.
But that hum is there.
Just below the surface.
Like a gnat flying by your ear. Too small to see, but you're highly aware of it's presence.
I have a dr's appt tomorrow.
I'm fairly sure, nothing will happen between now and then and tomorrow night.
But I could be wrong.

I'll just go ahead and say it

I'm ready to go into labor.
Any day now.
Really.

Cunksi... just thougt I'd let you know.
You're welcome to come... any day, any minute. I'm up for the adventure.
We're ready.
Even your butt covers are here.

It's sort of become like everyone lined up and hiding at a suprise party....waiting for the guest of honor to appear.

Just thought I'd vocalize it.

Yesterday and Today

I went to my sisters house last night and hung out with her... and we ended up staying up till 1:30 a.m.. which is no big deal for me cuz i've got insomnia anyway... but it was a bit much for her. But we were rolling on the floor laughing because i was regaling her with my hospital/IHS mishap stories. She found them highly amusing.. which they are, they are tragic... but SO funny! Tragic humor. Seems to be my life story. LOL. It was great... and the stories ARE funny.... I'm just glad I'm still around to tell them... as they could have all turned out badly. I htink her favorite one was the one where I broke my arm, and becuase of where i was living at the time, it took two days to get to the hospital and when I finally got there.... i couldn't get any help because the hospital was being evacuated. Damn prairie fires anyway. Anyway.... it was fun.
Today, we spent a good majority of the day at riverboat days... my sis and I, cuz we wanted to see Brule play. While I was there, i saw a few very cool vermillionites... and two other good friends from yankton.. so that was nice. Hubbs had to go in to do some work at the office, then he joined us... we all had (a very expensive) lunch and looked a bit at some of the art booths. But it wasn't long before I was too wore out to go on... so we headed home.
I took a nap for about an hour and then we went to my sisters house where she and i hung out and hubbs and cephansi went for a 10 mi bike ride. Then it was dinner time. And hanging out time... my dad called while i was there.. so he got to talk to me, sis and hubby. He's going through some stuff right now, cuz he is retiring and trying to move from his old house to his new... and all the insanity that ensues there. He owned his own business and all kinds of other things that make it harder for him to "just retire". Lots of loose ends to tie up. I told him to tie them all up and THEN come out and see us and the baby.... I want to spend time with him. So he was glad to hear that.... he has that grandpa thing going on where he thought he had to BE here as soon as the baby was born... but I said no. I would rather have him here later and spend time with him then have him rush here nad then turn around and have to leave. Besides... between all the vermillionites... she will have so many visitors as it is already. She's a very lucky and loved baby.
which reminds me.. baby update... went to the dr on thurs.... she has moved down into the pelivs and is in postion to be born... so now the countdown really begins. AND!!!! her diapers are finally here!! woot woot!!! the people at the store were like.. "what kind of diapers are those?"
So i was explaining that they are basically the 07' version of the cloth diaper... like a cloth diaper... but not. The clerk girl was really impressed and wanted to know why i wasn't using disposables.... and so i told her. She was all happy about it. She had a little tag next to her name tag that said: "I buy organic" So, i'm sure she got it. She said she was really happy i wasn't using disposables... which is what a lot of people say to me when i tell them. They are not as nearly happy as I am to be not using them. Even the hospital was impressed.... i had to talk to them and let them know we'd be bringing our own diapers. It is just such a relief to know that I won't be leaving a footprint in the landfill/earth in that sense, that will hang around for 500-800 years. The number still turns my stomach.
Ok, well I'm muchly ready for ohe.... for now, Mbb

Yes I'm Going to Wet the Bed

LOL, caught your attention didn't I?
I want it to actually cool down so I can have a fire, and have my friends over to enjoy it.... see if you haven't noticed, I love fire. Fire is fun, not in an arson kind of way... but a sit around and poke at logs kind of way. I have always loved fire, it was one of the actual GOOD skills I acquired from being a mormon and having to go to girls camp every summer. I learned how to make a mean fire, and made one every chance I got. (And get) Hubbs always say "You're going to wet the bed if you keep playing with fire." Which is funny, because I had never heard that wive's tale.
But anyway.. so the fireworks pictures are up and the belly pics will be up soon, maybe tomorrow, maybe the day after, then following those, or with them, will be the fair pics... of all the cute animals... and of course, the ones with the grown men on tractors... sorry, I don't think i have any good ones where their butts are hanging off the seats or their tractors are trying to buck them off.
I spent the day with my sister, which was fab, we talked alllllll day, which is always fun. It is so funny how we are totally sisters...She can drive me freakin' crrrraaaazzzzzzyyyy, but I love her as the day is long. I guess that is what sisterhood is about huh? We are both sort of counting down the days to the start of school, cuz then we have our girl time... and with her baby girl in tow, we all just hang out and be girls. Not in the sit around and put on makeup kind of girly girl way... in the old indian women kind of way. Where wesit-around-drink-coffee,laugh and talk like a bunch of old bitties sort of way. It is always about our family and husbands and such. We are as different as night and day, and yet, as I get older, I see this as a strength. It used to drive me nuts.. but now, it's helpful, because when I'm going WAY to fast, she can sort of pull me back, slow me down... and remind me to have patience, and I can be her kick in the pants when she is being too passive. And those sayings about sisters are so true.. I used to snort at them because I thought they were just cheesy fluff, but I see how true they really are. You know, the ones about how you will never have a relationship with anyone the way you have one with your sister. I get it now, and now I'm old enough to appreciate it. LOL. Evolution everywhere! :) Too cool!
And "My boys" (my nephews) are growing up!!!! Yey and Boo hoo! I have been with them since they all entered this world... and now the two oldest are well into teenhood and getting first loves.. ohhhh, it's soo...... I don't even know what the word would be. They both have had a rough road growing up... but they are doing well so far. I can't believe one is entering HS and one is in Jr High. It's wierd to see them going through some of the same things I and my sister went through when we were at that point in our lives.
I never really thought about what I was going through at the time... just lived it and got through it... but seeing it from an adult perspective now, it's amazing. To me, it was 'boring" everyday stuff, first time as a high school freshman, trying to find where you fit in, who you want to hang out with, first loves, first dances. It was all so blase to me... I hung out with who I wanted to, and didn't care about what other people thought... (no, I was never one for cliques or worrying over what other people thought of me. I just sort of charged through life and those around me could take it or leave it. I had no patience for any of the drama and angsty crap that most people ate up. I'm still the same way today. Since the small town drama irks the hell out of me) So seeing that boys also worry about having the "right friends" is so wierd. I never knew boys thought about that stuff. I see the oldest one trying to figure out who he is in the greater world and where he fits in... all normal stuff that I sort of just did. I realized early that I had been dealt a certain hand of cards that was what I had to work with, so I just concentrated on gettting out of high school as fast and as painless as possible. Thankfully, I did it (fairly) unscathed... but I see the things my oldest nephew worries about... and I want to do two things. A) Protect him. and B) Arm him with the knowledge that you can't please everyone, so just be yourself and be friends with whoever you want and how ever many people you want... and those who can deal with it will and those who can't, have issues bigger than you can solve. ( This is a lesson some of the adults I know need to learn.) When I was in school, I was a rotator.. (and to this day, I still am, sort of.) I hung out with all kinds of different groups... so I was never exclusive with just ONE clique. I liked a lot of different people for a lot of different reasons... and even though they didn't really like each other or would ever hang out together, they all knew that I hung out with both and they couldn't talk trash about each other.
I think it is a different world my boys are in today... not as simple,clean cut and "safe". Oldest nephew said he had to choose between two certain groups... and that bothered me. WHY? WHY do you have to choose? WHY? Why not be friends with both and give THEM the opportunity to step up and become better people?
And now I've blah, blah, blahed on and on. LOL. My main point is that they are both growing up and It provides me with a whole new look into the life of a teen ager.... so much different than mine was. More innocent in some ways.. but so much more violatile in others. I'm grateful that they are here in Vermtown where while it isn't perfect.. it is smaller and we have a bit more of a family feel here. Which is why my hs exp was not as tragic as it could have been.
Ok, shutting up now... for real. MBB

Fireworks

this even, hubbs, cahansi and I all went out for ice cream and pie... then we saw some fireworks on the way home... so we went to investigate... and saw a really great show. Will post pics tomorrow. be well, MBB

Mellowness

I'm in a mellow place. I'm very tired these days and doing a lot of sleeping, gearing up for little miss I suppose.
I dreamt the other night I was surrounded by women elders, we were all talking and just being, I felt loved and supported, and heard. I think it was because as I was falling asleep, I was thinking of my dear friends; many of whom are somewhat older than me, at least in the evolution sense... all wise and mothering and dear to my heart. It has been a wonderful realization for me to know that, even though I have lost important women, who were very dear to my heart, new ones have come to fill the void. Six years ago, I'd mourned the fact that my mother (birth) would not be here to see the birth of her Takoja,(grandchild) or two years ago, I was mourning the fact that dearest Tuwin (aunt) would not be here to play with and instill her wisdom in my daughter. But now I know, they, as well as all my other relatives, already know her, are taking care of her right now, are teaching her. And in the physical sense, other amazing women have come into my life to continue the lessons, gifts and joy my mother and aunt gave me... in different ways, but still. I'm glad I have evolved enough to know, and recognize this. It makes me all the more grateful for my dear friends.
My belly is getting bigger as the days go by and I'm feeling muchly pregnant. I'm not used to not being able to move about easily. I'm glad my belly is growing, that means baby is growing. She is still very active, and makes me laugh as she scampers about my belly, seemingly unaware that she is due to be born any day now. We have changed her name a bit... to be more suitable to her.
The countdown has officially begun, I know she will get here when she is ready... and I'm ok with that. I'm not going to rush her, or wish for her to be born any other time than when she is ready and when the relatives are ready for her to come. She is in good hands up there.
Nesting continues, which has been helped by hubby being off work the last few days. I love having him around, it is always nicer to be together than apart. I see him getting a bit nervous.. if there is a loud crash that he thinks may have been me, he rushes to make sure it wasn't, and he constantly checks in to make sure all body parts and systems are in proper working order. Such a sweetheart. There are quite a few crashes around here these days, as I am constantly dropping things and then must wait for someone to come pick them up for me. Though, when I am alone, I must do it myself.. needless to say I have gotten very adept at using my feet and my toes. If I can't get it with those.. it just stays on the floor until hubbs gets home.
In my dreams, baby is here, in all her small cuteness and adorability.
On one hand it is hard to believe that soon, two will be three and yet, it also seems so "natural". We installed the baby car seat in the car today... wow, it seems so wierd to have that in there. It is soo tiny... and so surreal that we are now a car seat couple. And that this year, when we take our christmas card pics, there will be a wee one with us. I'm so honored to be her mother... I can hardly wait to kiss her!!!!

Baby news, animals and carn-.. well almost carnage

So, went to the dr today... and after some torture... (another thing NOONE who has had children before warns you of) found out that baby is doing well and though she is still dancing about.. things are "progressing" and she could get here anytime. wow. hard to believe. I asked my dr if i should be concerned that she hasn't settled into the pelvis and she told me no, sometimes babies wait till the very last minute. hmm, what did i say the other day about procrastination? LOL!!!
After the torment was over, I went and picked up the swing for baby that I have been wanting. I waited until after the shower, just to be sure. So, I was very happy to have that for her and, short of her diapers...(the ones I want) she will have everything she needs.... or at least I think she needs. :)
Ohhh...it's all so exciting! Buying that swing made it a bit more real.. that in less than three weeks, a wee one will be here with us, for kissing and hugging and holding and loving!!!
Tonight.. hubs and I went to the clay co. fair. quite the spectacle for me. See, where I grew up, county fairs were on the scale of the sioux falls fair. So, seeing this clay county fair (for the first time might I add) was a bit funny (funny ha haa) to me. It's so small... and so short... three days??? what's up with that?
And no horses? Or horse shows or rodeos? Wierd. See, I was a 4-H girl... I prepared all winter and spring for the fair, I got my horse ready and did all my training. Then fair week came and I showed my horses, and camped out at the fairgrounds and did all the fun fair stuff, hung out with my fair friends, ate all the yummy carnival food i could only eat during fair week, rode all the midway rides, went to the dance at night...... looked forward to all of it. So, forgive me fo the laughter, but for me, this clay county fair is small potatoes.
BUT, one thing I have NEVER seen... was the tractor races. So, hubby and I went to watch. I couldn't stop laughing! And I couldn't believe this was real! I kept thinking it was some sort of joke, a huge joke for masses of people, like a comedy show. But, as I soon learned, it was very real, and these people (in the stands) take it very seriously. How dare I laugh my head off at a bunch of men driving around on little tractors, thier butts half way off the seat trying to out race each other. What was I thinking? And how dare I hope for some carnage... someone to be tossed on their kiester, or tip over, or something funny!!! I mean.. come on! Big men on what looked to me like children's tractors. .... How could you NOT laugh????? and hope for a tip over or two? Hubby said I was mean to wish carnage on them.. i didn't want anyone to get hurt...(after all, how hurt could you get when you are two feet from the ground on a child's toy?) Shit, I'm laughing about it right now....
So, needless to say, when there were wrecks, people running into each other, men (repeatedly) running into the berm, one or more going around a corner too fast and their tractors start to buck like horses, or tip up on two weels, I laughed Forgive me if this makes me seem cruel and heartless... I mean/meant no harm to anyone... but I did laugh... hysterically... and had to restrain myself from pointing. Besides...they were wearing helmets.
And also... the funniest part.... they have pace driver... who took his job VERY seriously as well.. he probably lives for this every year.. looks forward to it. Dreams about the day when he gets to ride his little tractor out there in his purdy yellow shirt... with his blinking little light on the back and his purdy flag flowing behind it.
Forgive me if any of you are die hard tractor race fans... i mean no disrspect... I've just never seen it before.
We did get to go see all the animals..so cute.. I wanted to hug and kiss them all.. but many of them looked at me as if i were nuts... but those lambs are just soooo cute!!!! and the cows.. with their babies.. awww... perfect for kisses! But, they'd have none of it. So, I took lots of pics instead.. which i will post later... tomorrow probably.
So, that was my day... baby went to her first fair... I was a bit tortured... and I got a good laff at grown men being dorky on children's toys.
I can hardly wait to see what will happpen over there next. I hear they do something with mud and buggies or something....that will i have to see.

Wed Eve

Well baby is busy growing.... and kicking.... and having a grand time. I am getting to the point though, where I wish she'd start thinking about putting that pelvic hat on, and preparing herself for birth. I am hoping she will, the closer things get.... though I'm not sure how close she'd like to cut it, as we are less than three weeks away from her "due date". Perhaps she has inhertied her Ate' and my sense of procrastination.
she is so very active, which of course, makes me happy. Kicking up a storm. Flipping around and pushing my ribs out to thier maxium length, that hurts. My ribs have become flared in the last few weeks and now my sternum is starting to seperate, that is a bit painful... about as painful as when my hips started to seperate. But, I'm not complaining... just perhaps whimpering a bit. LOL. It's hard to believe that about two weeks ago, i was all, "oh, i could stay pregnant forever..." and now reality and full on pregnancy has set in, and I am anxious for her to get here, as my body is feeling pregnant. I'm sure bodies have to do this, or women could be pregnant forever. All intellegent things, our bodies are such amazing pieces of work.
I have done a lot of sleeping and general resting this week. It hit me hard, and I'm having to rest much more now than I have throughout my whole pregnancy. I don't mind... I'm ready for it. LOL! I am not going through life at ninety miles an hour any more... more like a slowish turtle. Again.. gotta be a turtle to have a turtle!!! :)
For those of you who attended the shower.. your thank you's are in the mail.. so you should be recieving them within a day or two. I thank you for coming.. it was a pleasant wonderful evening.
Today I worked on getting more of baby's clothes organized and more of my hospital bag packed.... a bit here, a bit there. LOL. I'm really just finding things to do until she comes. It keeps me busy and the excitement in check.
My friend who was visiting me from back home left today, it was great having her here... and I'm finding my solitary groove again. I've had lots of vistors lately... both people from around town as well as ones from back home, that has been nice. Sort of preperation for after baby gets here.
Nesting kicked in big time today... but I can't do too much as I get tired so fast... so trying not to get too frustratd where that is concerned.
Life is good.
No, life is perfect. I have everything I could ever want. A best friend who is also my hubby, and a gorgeous daughter, both of whom I love more than anyone else in the universe.

Baby Joy

We had the baby shower last night, my wonderful friends were there, all of whom are dear to my heart. Baby cakes got some fabu gifts and the time was really enjoyable. My mother was in town for it, which was nice, but i didn't get to spend any time with here. My aunt was here as well... but i am ambivolent about her.
I'm getting more excited for baby to get here. She is sleeping a lot lately, she has much growing and putting on fat to do! :) I can hardly wait to see her, it will be so exciting. I should go send my thank you cards now... a little something to do before things get way too crazy.
Today is too humid again.. i will probably spend it working on T Y cards, and taking some naps.. I'm a little suprised at how very tired I am and get these days. I know it is from being at the tail end of my pregnancy, but I'm not used to being limited to be up for only a half hour at a time. If i'm up longer than that.... I get contractions.. so I'm resting.
For now, MBB

Iblukcan

I haven't been generating a lot of words of which to put on here. In a very creative place still though... what words are created are recorded in my notebook, maybe for public consumption at a later date. Still doing a lot of other art-y things... photos which you can see in my photos. Sort of just internal right now. As I've evolved, I have become one who doesn't really need the outside influence of others.
Have a very dear friend here visiting.. which is fabulous and brings me joy. We are both deeply creative, so we can be in the same room, painting, writing, shooting.. etc, and not need words.
As time has passed, I've realized it isn't the number of friends you have, but the quality. And I am blessed with valuable, dear friends. I'm very grateful for them.
for now, Le Miye

Lunch, movie, Harry Potter and Greens

I got a lot of work done yesterday, which made me muchly happy. I had a delicious lunch with a friend, that made me full and happy. (Thank you L.)

Last night, I finally got to see my movie Way of the Peaceful Warrior... (Which by the way, if any of you are interested in watching it, is called "Paceful Warrior") I didn't get to fininish it, because sleepiness took over. But it from waht I saw, it rocked! I was a bit skeptical because after I got it, I saw that they based the movie on the book... read, 'we took ample liberties to make it sellable." LOL. There were few glitches, but nothing major or upsetting.. as least as far as I got in the movie. The only bad thing was the main character they chose, was also in a few scary movies... now in MBB world, if i see you in a scary movie, or a movie where you play a really bad person,, you are etched in my brain as such. (seriously, it took me quite a few years and many viewings of Fried Green Tomatoes to get over my fear of the lady who broke the guys ankles in misery.) So the main character in Warrior, was a bit unnerving for me, because i'd previously seen him in quite a few scary movies. I know i'm not telling you actor/actresses names, I don't ever know them. Minute, unimportant detail. (and a bit of pregnancy brain.) Hell, yesterday I saw another dear friend at the CSG, and I totally blanked her name.... I felt so bad. Could not think of it for the life of me.

Anyway, so the movie is good. I had fully planned on going to capture some of the Harry craziness that was rumored to be hitting vermillion at the witching hour.... not that I wanted to be a part of it, but I certainly wanted to see it. Well, that didn't happen, as I was in bed by 11. I woke up this a.m quite refreshed and said... "dammit, I missed the harry potter craziness." I love JK Rowling as an author, have not read through any of her books, but as an author and a human being, she seems pretty amazing. All writers (ok, some writers, many writers) long to have her wham bam career. So, the morning news was all infested with harry potter-ness. I didn't watch it, I went and ate my breakfast.

Tortoise update. I had told you in a earlier post that I changed his name to Vern, but wasn't sure if I liked that.
I do. It will stay Vern. For those of you who have seen Over the Hedge, you know how that Vern was a Vern? Well, my little guy is a Vern as well. (and not just cuz he sleeps in a log.) He has informed me that there will be NO spinich in his food, he will only eat certain greens and the others will simply be tossed aside. This from an animal who, previous to living at my house, was fed frozen vegtables. What is it wiht my animals, I bring them into my house and suddenly they think they are royalty. So, I had to go buy him completly new food, food that up to this point, is still being decided on whether it is good enough or not.

Results to come.

But he is soo cute, you just want to kiss his little head.
But I can't. For risk of salmonella poisoning.
But I would, if I could.
Ok, I'm off to other adventures now. L I hope you and B had lots of fun at the b-day party for M. M, I hope you had a fab b-day.

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the stumble button absolutly rocks!!!! yet another thing to get addicted to on the internet... oh there are so many.

hektakiya

I'm back.
Again.
I keep leaving blogger, only to return. I love my other blog but I can't link my other friends to it, and that is annoying. And people keep wanting to find me, not easy to do with my other blog. So, I've returned.

I will try to put some writing in here, though it may just be blatherings and news and such. Maybe writings that are being "tried out."
It's lila kata kile. Much too hot.
I'm going now, maybe more later. MBB