Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Slip Sliding away

such does the time.
I have not posted, I know... but I have this gorgeous creature to care for. She has no time for anyone else, and simply wants to be in my arms, pressed against my chest, where our heart beats match and our breathing synchronizes.
Fine with me.
She is so beautiful.
She has been having tummy troubles, still. Our pediatrician and other medical people and non medical people keep saying..."she'll grow out of it, soon." But they don't sit with us when our darling daughter screams in pain and cries and looks at me/us like, "why can't you make it better mommy?"
Gut wrenching.
When you become a mother, you leap headfirst into all kinds of lessons. I think this is one of mine.
I've always wanted to keep my precious daughter from any pain, unhappiness or uncomfortablity. I've prided myself in the fact that I kept her safe, healthy and happy for nine months. I birthed her safely, and she was happy and ready to greet the world when she appeared.
I can't keep her from feeling this pain. I know it's a "random baby stage", but any parent who can stand by nonchalant while thier offspring is in pain....must have something wrong with their head.
So, I know that my lesson in all of this is, I have to acknowlege that I can't take this pain from her, I can't shield her from this, or make it stop. All I can do is what I will be doing her whole life. Holding her, telling her I love her, being with her. I can't take the pain for her, but I can be with her while she goes through it, so she doesn't have to do it alone.
And I can take comfort in the fact that she is doing fabulously, growing so fast, developing so well, (ahead of her age bracket actually) and when she isn't having belly pain.... she is a happy well adjusted little bebe, who is well aware of how much she is loved, not only by her parents but by so many other people.

oops- gotta go- cunksi is awake.... more later

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