So, things in my family are slowly returning to normal, post visit from an old friend.. in years, not so much in age.
One of the things her visit did do,(and there were so many others) was make me realize that there needs to be a wasicu reading list. For real, I'm serious. Having her here for a week, I felt like I was literally living out a Kent Nerburn book.
It would be ideal for people like her, who: A) never shut up, which makes learning anything impossible! and B) a quick reference guide for the completely ignorant or misinformed person this would also include the ones who only have the over romanticized and way off base ideas about our culture.
See, these would provide a look into some of the history, some of the important historical events, (from the REAL historians) many issues we have come up against, come from, and why some things are the way they are.
This will be a growing list, as I think of them, and there are sooo many.
But I realized this needed to be done, because she was here for a week, and she could have easily learned something and gotten more information and a quick education at the same time.
So here they are: In NO particular order other than when they came into my head.
*Birthed From Scorched Hearts,
Genocide of the Mind,
Eating Fire, Tasting Blood: all edited by Marijo Moore.
I have included these, not because my work is in them, but because they have some amazing, knowledgeable writers in them and they cover really important issues in Indian History that let the reader learn about our history without wanting to fall asleep
Custer Died For Your Sins: Vine Deloria Jr.
If you have read it, you understand why I'm including this, if you have not, then read it and you will understand.
Dammed Indians: The Pick-Sloan Plan and the Missouri River Sioux1944-1980: Michael Lawson
This issue is dear to my heart; I have done extensive research on this, and presented it various places.
Salt Camp: Ollie Napesni: a dear, sweet woman who taught at Sinte Gleska, (my tribal alma mater) This is a really great book if you want history laced with a true story.
The Dakota Way of Life: Ella Cara Deloria
And because they provide such an accurate (and hilarious) other side aspect, I have to include Kent Nerburn's
Neither Wolf Nor Dog
and
The Wolf at Twilight
There are so many others, which I will include, but it's about 12:30 a.m and I'm exhausted, so that is all for now.
And yes, I'm fully aware that they are pretty much Lakota based,(save the anthologies) but as a Lakota, that is the place I naturally come from first. (Plus, you know it, we are just plain kick ass!)
Lakotas in the house, Lakotas in the house, Lakotas in the house so wat ya gonna do?
Song:Lakotas by Lakota Empire) Turtle LOVES to sing this song!!
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
Sunday, April 4, 2010
Workshop
I will be giving a writing workshop at a writing conference in Valentine July 16-18, 2010. I will also be giving two public readings. More details to come. So please sign up and come spend some time with me and let's scribble, scribble, scribble!!
Hope you are all well,
Hope you are all well,
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
More than just letters
Tiwahe Wica Yu Wita Win
I've been thinking lately of my Lakota name. I always want to put it on things, i.e my phone(s); but never can, because the character allowance, is not long enough. it stops at Wit. If I type it in with no spaces, it will stop at: tiwahewichayuwitawi. Which, I guess might be OK. But I know better. It could be seen as acceptable as the shortened version of Win, or properly, Winyan.
I say I know better, because I do. I was taught the proper way to use my Language and why we need to use it that way. Even though, as the days go by, this concept seems to be slipping away with the ozone.
An elder of mine and I have had many discussions on how our culture has become what I call the 7-11 culture. Easy, fast, instant gratification. (I could post once a day everyday for the next year on THAT alone.) This isn't right. Our culture has always had its very own language and rules for the language, reasons for WHY words are the way they are. As an alumni of Sinte Gleska University, I will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, be for, use first, and defend (adamantly, if need be), our "true" language. The language that was put into print because of Albert White Hat.
Back to my name. Now, the proper word for Woman, is Winyan. Over time it has been acceptable to use Win. However, to use Wi, is shortening it for mere convenience, the word Wi has it's own meaning namely, the sun.
Knowing that, I refuse to perpetuate the convenience of my culture; I will not allow my name to be bastardized and shortened to Wi. First of all, my name is sacred, in the sense that it was given to me by my father, it was picked especially for me, and(to my foremost knowledge,) it is directly and correctly translated as is, without any adjustments needing to be made. Meaning, he did not have to come up with a Lakota translation for an English word.
I am VERY proud of my name. It envelops completely, my journey home and all the stepping stones that were put in place on that journey. It gave me goosebumps when I received it, because I knew what it meant, and flashed on a few specific times in my life when these events had happened. In a life so far away, and so foreign from the people whose blood flowed through my veins. It was another confirmation that the spirits had kept their hands in my life, and I had not been tossed carelessly to the greater world beyond.
I, by no means, am a fluent speaker, but I'm a constant student, as are most people,even in the English language. But this is what I know. I AM a Lakota Winyan, I am an Ina, a member of the Sicangu Nation, and therefore, it is my duty to not let our language, (or our ways) get bastardized by the wasicu "scholars" who want to make money off of it, and who, by the way DO NOT send one penny of that money back here to our tribe, our university OR our reservation. Nor can I allow it to drift away on the morning mist. I know that once it's gone, it's gone for good. And then we will be no better than, common mainstream Americans who once had a culture, but don't know much about it now.
Had I not returned home, I'd have been a Indian with no tribe, no language, no pride. But I have returned, I have taken my place in the hoop, and now I have this gorgeous daughter who speaks the language, knows her culture. She will grow up with the ceremonies, the traditions, the everyday, the this-is-what-we-do-because- this-is-who-we-are. She, will not know any different. As it should be. You cannot live your culture when it's "cool", "fun" or easy. If you are living as you should be, it will rarely be easy.
We have had far too many generations of soul-wounded, displaced, lost children who gravitate and latch onto any form of connection... (I.E, gangs). The time for that is over. We must do our parts to re instill the culture in ourselves, our lives, our children, our tribe. Do we have the answers to EVERYTHING? No. But that is what our tiwahe, tiyospaye and oyate, is for.
PS: I purposely did not translate my name. Maybe on a another day.
I've been thinking lately of my Lakota name. I always want to put it on things, i.e my phone(s); but never can, because the character allowance, is not long enough. it stops at Wit. If I type it in with no spaces, it will stop at: tiwahewichayuwitawi. Which, I guess might be OK. But I know better. It could be seen as acceptable as the shortened version of Win, or properly, Winyan.
I say I know better, because I do. I was taught the proper way to use my Language and why we need to use it that way. Even though, as the days go by, this concept seems to be slipping away with the ozone.
An elder of mine and I have had many discussions on how our culture has become what I call the 7-11 culture. Easy, fast, instant gratification. (I could post once a day everyday for the next year on THAT alone.) This isn't right. Our culture has always had its very own language and rules for the language, reasons for WHY words are the way they are. As an alumni of Sinte Gleska University, I will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, be for, use first, and defend (adamantly, if need be), our "true" language. The language that was put into print because of Albert White Hat.
Back to my name. Now, the proper word for Woman, is Winyan. Over time it has been acceptable to use Win. However, to use Wi, is shortening it for mere convenience, the word Wi has it's own meaning namely, the sun.
Knowing that, I refuse to perpetuate the convenience of my culture; I will not allow my name to be bastardized and shortened to Wi. First of all, my name is sacred, in the sense that it was given to me by my father, it was picked especially for me, and(to my foremost knowledge,) it is directly and correctly translated as is, without any adjustments needing to be made. Meaning, he did not have to come up with a Lakota translation for an English word.
I am VERY proud of my name. It envelops completely, my journey home and all the stepping stones that were put in place on that journey. It gave me goosebumps when I received it, because I knew what it meant, and flashed on a few specific times in my life when these events had happened. In a life so far away, and so foreign from the people whose blood flowed through my veins. It was another confirmation that the spirits had kept their hands in my life, and I had not been tossed carelessly to the greater world beyond.
I, by no means, am a fluent speaker, but I'm a constant student, as are most people,even in the English language. But this is what I know. I AM a Lakota Winyan, I am an Ina, a member of the Sicangu Nation, and therefore, it is my duty to not let our language, (or our ways) get bastardized by the wasicu "scholars" who want to make money off of it, and who, by the way DO NOT send one penny of that money back here to our tribe, our university OR our reservation. Nor can I allow it to drift away on the morning mist. I know that once it's gone, it's gone for good. And then we will be no better than, common mainstream Americans who once had a culture, but don't know much about it now.
Had I not returned home, I'd have been a Indian with no tribe, no language, no pride. But I have returned, I have taken my place in the hoop, and now I have this gorgeous daughter who speaks the language, knows her culture. She will grow up with the ceremonies, the traditions, the everyday, the this-is-what-we-do-because- this-is-who-we-are. She, will not know any different. As it should be. You cannot live your culture when it's "cool", "fun" or easy. If you are living as you should be, it will rarely be easy.
We have had far too many generations of soul-wounded, displaced, lost children who gravitate and latch onto any form of connection... (I.E, gangs). The time for that is over. We must do our parts to re instill the culture in ourselves, our lives, our children, our tribe. Do we have the answers to EVERYTHING? No. But that is what our tiwahe, tiyospaye and oyate, is for.
PS: I purposely did not translate my name. Maybe on a another day.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Surrender?
Surrender?
Mary Black Bonnet
(For:"Inala" SBC)
I want to engulf you,
in bubble wrap.
Carry you gently.
Not because you are fragile or weak.
Anything but.
Rather Immense in your sacredness, wisdom
spirit and kindness.
All we need to be.
Some strive for it,
others look on.
Their insecurities flashing, blinding their vision;
sunbeams on a car bumper.
As they cruise into the sunset
too young to care for this moment.
They don't see what lies ahead.
Acculturation.
Assimilation.
In its worst form.
Strong Proud warriors,
now common sheep.
The hard fought battle
can't be over!
Not yet. Not like this.
This war has been too long,
claimed victims too many, brought victories too few.
For a flip of the hair,
the boom-boom of bass
in a hot rez rod.
As they leave their
Proud, mutilated, Beautiful, culture
in the rear view mirror.
When the dust clears,
a raw, gaping hole left in its wake.
As they wave to us,
from the other side of the glass.
Mary Black Bonnet
(For:"Inala" SBC)
I want to engulf you,
in bubble wrap.
Carry you gently.
Not because you are fragile or weak.
Anything but.
Rather Immense in your sacredness, wisdom
spirit and kindness.
All we need to be.
Some strive for it,
others look on.
Their insecurities flashing, blinding their vision;
sunbeams on a car bumper.
As they cruise into the sunset
too young to care for this moment.
They don't see what lies ahead.
Acculturation.
Assimilation.
In its worst form.
Strong Proud warriors,
now common sheep.
The hard fought battle
can't be over!
Not yet. Not like this.
This war has been too long,
claimed victims too many, brought victories too few.
For a flip of the hair,
the boom-boom of bass
in a hot rez rod.
As they leave their
Proud, mutilated, Beautiful, culture
in the rear view mirror.
When the dust clears,
a raw, gaping hole left in its wake.
As they wave to us,
from the other side of the glass.
Sunday, November 8, 2009
Dribble drather
I've been away from my blog, but not away from writing, or arting by any means.
I've just finished an essay for Florida Review and wrapped up a photo show.
Things are good. I realized, finally, that walking away from art, especially writing, just wasn't going to happen. It wasn't meant to. It stalked me like a hunter, it came to me in dreams, it tugged at my heart, my mind, my hands.
I'm glad.
There have been other things going on as well, but I've not sorted through them. I'm a pretty private person. I don't really allow my "rawness" be shown, until I'm good and ready. You all may find this shocking considering how raw I write in publications. But it all comes out only after much mulling, healing, and editing. So, when the time is right, I will talk about what is going on here, the pull is there so it won't be long.
Turtle came to my show today, which was a huge relief, or we'd have been apart for 4 hours, the longest in our whole time together. It would probably have been harder on me, I'm sure. We're so connected, so enmeshed. I love being with her, she is hilarious and funny, and smart. I love talking to her, listening to her. Life with her continues to be mind blowingly amazing.
At the show i saw a woman with a 3 month old..my uterus started throbbing, and my arms started tingling. I remember turtle that tiny, that young, that new. i reminded myself that there will be another one soon...but I still wanted to snatch that baby up, hold her, smell her, kiss her and snuggle her. It was sad, because the mother of the baby, was a teen mother and couldn't care less about that baby, that special time she has right now. A mother who hadn't "meant to" get pregnant,(UM HELLO, that's what CONDOMS are FOR!! GRR) and now sees her beautiful gift as a hindrance to her fun. It was heartbreaking.
I walked out and there was turtle, running up to me, jumping into my arms, her little arms wrapped around me as she nuzzled into my neck. She smelled like fresh air. I held her as I spoke with people, and she helped, telling them where we took our photos, complete with hand signals. ohhh, she's sooo cute!
Ok, i gotta go, a turtle is rustling around in bed... she'll be calling soon.
I've just finished an essay for Florida Review and wrapped up a photo show.
Things are good. I realized, finally, that walking away from art, especially writing, just wasn't going to happen. It wasn't meant to. It stalked me like a hunter, it came to me in dreams, it tugged at my heart, my mind, my hands.
I'm glad.
There have been other things going on as well, but I've not sorted through them. I'm a pretty private person. I don't really allow my "rawness" be shown, until I'm good and ready. You all may find this shocking considering how raw I write in publications. But it all comes out only after much mulling, healing, and editing. So, when the time is right, I will talk about what is going on here, the pull is there so it won't be long.
Turtle came to my show today, which was a huge relief, or we'd have been apart for 4 hours, the longest in our whole time together. It would probably have been harder on me, I'm sure. We're so connected, so enmeshed. I love being with her, she is hilarious and funny, and smart. I love talking to her, listening to her. Life with her continues to be mind blowingly amazing.
At the show i saw a woman with a 3 month old..my uterus started throbbing, and my arms started tingling. I remember turtle that tiny, that young, that new. i reminded myself that there will be another one soon...but I still wanted to snatch that baby up, hold her, smell her, kiss her and snuggle her. It was sad, because the mother of the baby, was a teen mother and couldn't care less about that baby, that special time she has right now. A mother who hadn't "meant to" get pregnant,(UM HELLO, that's what CONDOMS are FOR!! GRR) and now sees her beautiful gift as a hindrance to her fun. It was heartbreaking.
I walked out and there was turtle, running up to me, jumping into my arms, her little arms wrapped around me as she nuzzled into my neck. She smelled like fresh air. I held her as I spoke with people, and she helped, telling them where we took our photos, complete with hand signals. ohhh, she's sooo cute!
Ok, i gotta go, a turtle is rustling around in bed... she'll be calling soon.
Monday, October 12, 2009
The sweat lodge deaths, my Lakota perspective
I'm very upset over the deaths and injuries in the Sedona, Az situation.
There are so many things wrong in that situation, I don't even know where to begin.
First of all, people were doing something they had no business doing.
The sweat lodge is a sacred ceremony that wasicu's have no right trying to replicate. Oh wait, they have tried, it's called a sauna.
The man, or people, (because I'm sure this Ray guy was not the ONLY one who runs these)who was running this, was collecting money for it. First of all, to replicate something that isn't even YOUR culture, and a SACRED ceremony no less, but then to take an asinine amount of money, is unbelievably wrong, unethical and heinous. Personally, I hope this man is charged with manslaughter. Because if this were a native running things where people had died, you'd better believe they'd be slapped with a law suit so fast, their heads would spin.
Now, also, I'm so sick of people thinking if they get a little "Native spirituality" their lives will be better. Stop guru-ing us. New Ager's piss me off. They are so busy trying on other people's beliefs that if they'd just stop running from themselves, explore their own culture, or belief system; they might find the answers. If you can't fix your own problems and your own lives, don't look to us to do it. We can't wave a magic buffalo horn and say a few special words and make YOUR life better. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness, no matter HOW much money you have, or WHO you pay to play "Indian medicine man."
The bottom line I see is this, a wasicu was playing with things he had NO RIGHT to be playing with, and people (sheep) were more than willing to follow along blindly. And now, bad choices ALL AROUND have cost people a dear price.
Hopefully the sweat lodge at that resort, will be shut down, and people will start thinking twice about blindly following something they don't know the real story behind.
As I write that last line, I realize I better clarify. When i say follow blindly, I mean, thinking you can go to some white "medicine Man" who you think is going to fix your life. No one can fix your life, except you. If you didn't have the tools you need to succeed in life before you went into that sweat lodge, you're not going to suddenly gain them when you walk out. Lakota( Native) spirituality is not something you can dabble in, something you can see, something you can touch. It is something you are born with, or into, it's a way of life. Many people try to "Show" their spirituality, but it's something that must be lived, must come from within. If someone is "wearing" their spirituality on them, (or showing it, in whatever form) that to me, says a lot more about that person than what they believe (or don't) in.
There are so many things wrong in that situation, I don't even know where to begin.
First of all, people were doing something they had no business doing.
The sweat lodge is a sacred ceremony that wasicu's have no right trying to replicate. Oh wait, they have tried, it's called a sauna.
The man, or people, (because I'm sure this Ray guy was not the ONLY one who runs these)who was running this, was collecting money for it. First of all, to replicate something that isn't even YOUR culture, and a SACRED ceremony no less, but then to take an asinine amount of money, is unbelievably wrong, unethical and heinous. Personally, I hope this man is charged with manslaughter. Because if this were a native running things where people had died, you'd better believe they'd be slapped with a law suit so fast, their heads would spin.
Now, also, I'm so sick of people thinking if they get a little "Native spirituality" their lives will be better. Stop guru-ing us. New Ager's piss me off. They are so busy trying on other people's beliefs that if they'd just stop running from themselves, explore their own culture, or belief system; they might find the answers. If you can't fix your own problems and your own lives, don't look to us to do it. We can't wave a magic buffalo horn and say a few special words and make YOUR life better. Everyone is responsible for their own happiness, no matter HOW much money you have, or WHO you pay to play "Indian medicine man."
The bottom line I see is this, a wasicu was playing with things he had NO RIGHT to be playing with, and people (sheep) were more than willing to follow along blindly. And now, bad choices ALL AROUND have cost people a dear price.
Hopefully the sweat lodge at that resort, will be shut down, and people will start thinking twice about blindly following something they don't know the real story behind.
As I write that last line, I realize I better clarify. When i say follow blindly, I mean, thinking you can go to some white "medicine Man" who you think is going to fix your life. No one can fix your life, except you. If you didn't have the tools you need to succeed in life before you went into that sweat lodge, you're not going to suddenly gain them when you walk out. Lakota( Native) spirituality is not something you can dabble in, something you can see, something you can touch. It is something you are born with, or into, it's a way of life. Many people try to "Show" their spirituality, but it's something that must be lived, must come from within. If someone is "wearing" their spirituality on them, (or showing it, in whatever form) that to me, says a lot more about that person than what they believe (or don't) in.
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